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January 18, 2021

You are digging and digging in the sand for the buried treasure.

You are convinced that it is in this exact spot.

Everyone has always told you that this is where it is, that all you have to do is dig and dig and then someday you will find it and all your problems, all of those worries, fears, and laments that you have carried for so long, will be gone just like that.

You are super focused. And you are convinced by the chatterbox of noise in your own head (it’s a surround sound stereo you wear like a helmet) that IT IS RIGHT HERE.

If you just keep digging and digging and digging in THIS EXACT SPOT, you are going to find it someday.

Someday you are gonna be rich, you are gonna get a condo right along this beach. You are gonna buy that forest green light brown leather convertible jaguar you’ve wanted since you were 21. You are gonna go eat out at the most expensive restaurants every night if you want to.

No one is going to be able to tell you what to do. You will be the boss! Yeah, it takes everything you have, but the rewards (however illusive at the moment) will be worth it!

With all this buried treasure, you are finally gonna write that book. With all this buried treasure, you are gonna pay off all your debt and finally be free. Some day you will get there. Someday, you just know it. Then everyone will see.

Someday, if you just keep digging and digging and digging, working harder and harder and harder, you will reach the point where you can finally stop. Then you can rest. Then it will be glorious!

All you have to do, says the booming voice in your head, is just keep digging, just keep working, just keep striving, just keep exhausting yourself.

Someday you will be able to rest. Someday, but not now. It you stop now, it will ruin everything, says the voice.

Don’t stop for air. Don’t stop for a drink of water. Don’t stop to eat or pee. Just keep digging. Just keep going. Just keep reaching for the “goal.” You are almost there, you are almost there, you are almost there….

Whatever it is… a house, a car, a relationship, a situation, a state of being…striving is the answer! Hard work will get you there. Don’t question. Just keep digging, the voice screams out in loud booms and bangs.

 And whatever you do, says the voice, almost like a threat, while you dig, don’t you dare stop turn the chatter box stereo system in your mind to “off!”

Meanwhile, while all this is going on, God waits in the wings.

He smiles and pours sunlight down on you as you dig. He makes a breeze ruffle your hair as you sweat and toil. He tickles your nose with beach flies, that you annoyingly brush away in a huff.

He nudges a seagull to fly by, squawking in the direction where the real treasure lies.

Finally he blows sand in your face.

This causes you to stop for just a split second. This is all the “time” God needs. Before you reach your hand out to rub your eye, God gently pierces your heart.

It’s just a pin prick. Its just a tap. Its a ting, like the ringing of the tiniest bell.

There is a gap of silence in the playlist in your head.

It is just a fraction of a second. It is a nano-moment. It would seem to a human being as completely insignificant, unnoticeable, an unworthy as a dust bunny in the corner of a room.  

But to God, that nanosecond could very well be…if he wanted it to be…an hour, a day, or a thousand years.

God sees time as the clearest water in the deepest lake. God can also mold time like clay.

At that very moment, while you sit on your knees on the sand, God decides to creates earmuffs around you with time. He decides to swirl soft material around your aching ears and swab your nose with the  delicate smell of roses in the rain.

To you, however, sitting at the shore, there is simply a breath. More specifically, there is an inbreath. It comes very naturally, even though you are not at all used to doing it. The breath comes on God’s hands with stealth, quickly, and to you it comes without thinking or warning.

To you, it is like the sweetest delight. It is an almond cake and a soft pillow. It is gentle music, piano in high C or flute or the tinkling of chimes. It is intoxicating, fulfilling, and completely satisfying. You drink in this breath as if you were drinking cool water in the desert.

What you don’t know is that the inbreath is the light of His Love engulfing you. And with the inbreath, this Love begins to swim in you.

What you don’t know is that this inbreath is the thick red wine of returning home. It is the re-collection of all that You are into all that He is and the intertwining of it all in a human body.

Its okay that you don’t know any of this now. Its okay that at that moment, all you know is that you  have sand in your eyes and you just took a breath of sea air.  For you, this is enough.

What harm could it do to take another? You think. After all, it’s just a breath!

After an inbreath, however, there is naturally an outbreath. And with this, a cycle is completed and the reset has occurred. Once again, your heart beats in rhythm with Him.

With the outbreath also comes the relaxing, the sighing, and then the releasing in the nervous system. There is a letting go in the lungs, in the heart, in the legs, in the elbows and in the millions of chemical processes that no one ever knows about that pump chemical and energetic substances into the body and the brain.

Some of these chemicals tell the body to run, freeze, flee, continue, plunge ahead, keep the nose to the grindstone, don’t question, stay in fear, keep your head down, brush away tears, yell out in anger, consume products, keep the system going at all costs.

Others tell the body to relax, accept, allow, receive, and heal, to rest and relax, to let Love in and to give Love back, to run and skip in time to the rhythm of the universe, to be like a child and go traveling through the cosmos. Some chemistry in the body can help you to sit at your rightful place, at the side of the Father, at the foot of the mountain, wearing the bejeweled crown of the King.

Someday soon you will realize that you were never meant to search for buried treasure. You were meant to wear the treasure your Father has already given you.

With the inbreath, without you even knowing it, you breath in the Love of Eternal Salvation. With the outbreath, unbeknownst to you, you allow the nurturing, rose-scented wind of the Holy Spirit to breathe through you.

Then Yeshua, for it can only be Yeshua, cradles your head in His comforting yet sturdy hands.

“Look” he whispers, as he guides you in the direction of the open sea.

There the treasure sits. It was there all along. It is was not buried. It was in plain sight. It was never, ever hidden with the ebb and flow of the tides. It has always been as bright and as obvious as the morning sun.

How could I have missed it? You wonder.  

Do you forget about all your striving? Not completely. It is still there. The hole is there. The shovel is there. The tiny bits of sand that cascade into the chasm night after night, covering up all the work you had done the day before when you weren’t looking, this is still there. You see all of it, but it is as if it all had happened to someone else.

Now, there is a breath that beckons. There is a voice that calls. There is a yearning that you lean into. There is a seed of something indescribable beginning to bloom inside.  

There is faith growing that is not superimposed by any external force. In time it will turn into convulsions of violent peace, waves of ecstasy that have no rational explanation and no timing to their coming. This peace, this joy, this ecstasy, this rapture will be the glistening jewels of immortality, the keys to your abundance and the scrolls of perfection that were yours all along.

Throughout space and time and the cosmos, there will be the unshaking and visceral presence. This will be Yeshua…father, son, holy spirit…leading you gently out of the darkness and into the Light.

Eventually you will come to realize that He is You and You are He and you/He have always been held in the Light.

And that the Light is your home.

Over the years, there had always been Him smiling tenderly, an ache in His heart, as he watched you toil. Now there is a small voice that asks the question, in such a joyful, open-hearted voice that it intrigues you to no end.

 What if…?

Yes, all that possibility exists in a single moment. All that glory and joy and abundance is and was happening now and then and forever.

But there at the beach, as you sit between a gaping hole and golden treasure, it is just a single, holy, complete, and healing breath.

At that moment, the breath is all that you need.

©2021 Nikki Lyn Pugh


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